Their Heart Search: Bethany & Jordan's Story (Search Series) Page 8
Raiden shoved his hands into his pocket again. “I know that but he…God I don’t want to even think about what he would’ve done to her.” Bethany shuddered she didn’t either. She didn’t know Kai Lukas at all anymore.
“Maybe he said something ask her it might help you to talk with her about this morning.” She wasn’t sure but it was worth a try.
“Hey, you two.” Her mom poked her head outside. They both looked to her. “I’m all done. just some bruising and scratches, she’s going to be sore for a couple of days, but otherwise lucky.” That was a relief, she could see some of the tension leave Raiden’s body. “I gave her some pain medicine to take as needed, but mostly she’s just going to need a little bit of love. Raiden smiled, Bethany knew him well enough to know Tai would get all the love she needed.
“We’ll lockup, go get her.” Bethany said and Raiden nodded and jetted up the stairs to get to Tai.
Once back in the car her mother spoke, “Beth, go home to him.” Bethany nodded and dropped her mom off to get her car. Then she sped home.
Jordan
The door to the apartment opened and he was worried about what this would bring. After all, she had slapped him, and kicked him out all in one day.
“Hi,” she said softly closing the door and walking towards him slowly.
“Hi,” he replied, the hesitation clear in his voice.
“I’m sorry,” she whispered as she lunged at him landing in his lap. She cried and he just held her tight.
“I love you,” he whispered in her ear. He needed her to know. He didn’t understand her apology or tears at the moment, but what was most important was that she understood his feelings for her. He’d still provide patience as needed, but she was his and it was time she knew that.
“I know you do. And I….I….I’m not ready, but I’m really glad you stayed.” She hiccupped and he cupped her face in his hands and wiped her tears.
“What happened?” he asked.
“Raiden found his fight,” she said smiling for the first time since she walked through the door.
“What? She’s staying?” She nodded.
“Mom and I went over so she could be checked out. They’re over the moon about the engagement, but the day’s events put a damper on things a bit.” Jordan smiled and nodded.
“I can imagine, but I’m happy for them.” She shook her head. “You’re not happy?” he questioned.
“No I am, I am happy for them, but for us too.” She pressed her lips to his and it was all Jordan needed he parted her lips and when their tongues entwined he knew they would be okay. He picked her up and carried her to her bedroom never breaking their kiss.
Bethany
Their kiss was heated, she was so lost until she was flat on her bed and Jordan’s hands were exploring. She shoved against his chest. “Too soon.” She panted. He just nodded and kissed her lightly.
“Sorry, beautiful, but I couldn’t help myself. That moment…that moment was perfect.” The moment was perfect? Seriously? She had broken their kiss. She was pretty sure things would lead elsewhere because things were getting hot fast.
“Perfect?” She questioned him unsure.
“Yeah, beautiful every moment I get with you is perfect.” She smiled, she didn’t deserve him.
“Stay in here tonight?” He nodded but crawled off the bed. “Where are you going?”
“To make sure I’m safe for sleeping in here and to make dinner.” She laughed.
“Sounds good. I’ll start dinner though.” He smiled and helped her off the bed. Sex was off the table for now. It had to be. He didn’t know about Kai yet. She couldn’t take that risk without him knowing, especially now.
Jordan
She had put some space between them the last week. He fucking hated space, but he blamed himself as well. When she got home and told him about Raiden and Tai’s engagement he lost control. He wanted her so badly and he wanted her to know that. Things had gone too far though.
Her bedroom door opened and she stepped out, he had to work today but not till later so he was going to play makeup. He had been doing it all week long. “You work later, right?” she asked, the distance in her voice killed him.
“Yep, was hoping we could hang out till I had to leave.” he stated, standing up and walking towards her.
“Dale comes in today, right?” she questioned changing the subject. Damn it!
“Yes, his flight is due in soon, I think.” He had no choice he had answer her.
“Awesome. Bet Tai is happy.” Was this really how things were going to be?
“Beautiful, talk to me,” he pleaded.
“I thought I was,” she spit at him. He sighed at her words.
“Bethany, come on, baby,” he begged, moving towards her. She took a step back.
“I need time.” He sighed. “You promised me you wouldn’t push, well you did and now I need space!” She said storming out of the apartment. He didn’t follow, he couldn’t. He had promised to not push.
What he needed now was leverage. He checked the time on his phone before dialing. The minute the call picked up Jordan spat, “What the fuck man? She’s impossible.” Okay so the space this week had gotten to him. That first night after Raiden and Tai got engaged they did sleep in the same bed. She had a dream and he held her close, but everything changed in the morning. He didn’t understand.
“Dude, if this is about Bethany, you need to give her room to maneuver. She was stuck in a zone for so long she thought she was going to be forced to marry me. She never got close to anyone because she was afraid of it crushing her when I didn’t settle down.” Jordan thought about Raiden’s words, it was true.
“But you did, Raiden,” he spat out. Why didn’t she see that?
“Yeah, I did, man, but maybe it hasn’t completely sunk in yet.” What the hell was he saying? Did she not want him to settle down? What was the night after the kidnapping then? She kissed him first that night.
“Are you saying she had feelings for you?” He didn’t want to ask, but he had to know.
“No Jordan, no more than a friendship. I meant that maybe it hasn’t sunk in that she is free. Look, dude, she’s never been with anyone except a few kisses, as far as I know anyways.” Jordan lost his voice as Raiden’s words echoed in his head. Was she a virgin? Oh, fucking idiot! How did he not see that? “Jordan.” Raiden spoke pulling Jordan from his thoughts.
“Are you saying she’s a virgin?” Raiden chuckled a little this was not fucking funny. He was being serious.
“Yeah, dude, that’s what I’m saying, but I could be wrong.” Jordan did not think Raiden was wrong in this case. “Just take things slow with her, she cares she does.” Jordan knew she more than cared, she just had to let herself fall the rest of the way. He’d catch her he would.
“Yeah, okay, I’ll let you go. I know Tai’s dad is due in soon.” Jordan just hung up, no goodbye.
The apartment door opened and she just stood there in the doorway and stared at him. What did he say?
Bethany
She was being unfair to him, but she had let him get too close without him knowing the truth. Everything circled in her head that night, Kai and her had sex, Raiden and Tai were engaged, she was free, she kissed Jordan, she loved him, Kai kidnapped Tai, it was a giant mess.
“Are you going to talk to me, beautiful?” he asked cautiously.
“I’m scared,” she whispered.
“Of what?” he asked standing and walking towards her.
“Of what you’ll think of me.” She hoped that made some sense.
“Beautiful, nothing would turn me away, not even you being a virgin.” Her eyes widened. Who told him that? “You’re not, are you?” he asked clearly reading her face. She shook her head. “Tell me, please,” he pleaded. She nodded and walked towards the couch. He followed her. She didn’t sit, she didn’t face him; she closed her eyes and prepared herself.
“Just once,” she whispered.
“Okay, with who? N
o wait, that doesn’t matter.” She turned around, because it did matter.
“Kai.” She said locking her eyes with him. He stared at her and fell to the couch. “See, it does matter.”
“Sit with me, beautiful. Tell me.” She sighed, he really cared. He really wanted to know. Well here goes nothing.
She sat down and he pulled her into his lap. She liked this position it helped to calm her. “When we were twenty-one Kai was changing, but he hadn’t changed enough for me to write him off. Raiden and Kai’s friendship was strained. We both knew there would come a time when Kai finally bought into what his father believed.” Jordan nodded and she continued, “Raiden and I both assumed that when our meeting with the elders came up Kai would just go Dark Night. Get it over with.”
“I’m confused,” he stated, she nodded.
“There are two kinds of vampires, those like myself, Raiden, Kai, my mom and then there are Dark Night or your typical vampire. Most of the elders are Dark Night.”
“I thought Lee was in charge.” She nodded.
“He is, but there is an elder panel. Lee’s idea to keep things in check. When you have a society of vampires, humans, half-breeds, and vampires living human lives you need help keeping it in check.” Jordan nodded.
“I understand that.” She inhaled, she had to tell him the rest.
“It was three weeks before we had to gather before the elders and make our choice. Continue as our parents chose for us or go Dark Night. It was an escape if we wanted it. I knew what I wanted until that night. The three of us were at my house. We were drinking. Raiden tried to cut me off and I hissed at him that we weren’t married yet so he couldn’t tell me what to do.” Jordan laughed.
“It’s really not funny.” She chuckled.
“Listening to you tell Raiden off would have most definitely been funny, beautiful.” She sighed maybe he was right; maybe there was some humor in this sad story.
“Well he left after that, but Kai stayed. Lukas and I had a connection. His relationship with Raiden was fading fast, but he talked to me. I didn’t want to give our friendship up.” She got off Jordan’s lap and walked towards the glass patio door.
He didn’t move it wasn’t lost on her. “Bethany, there isn’t anything wrong with that.” His words profound, she sighed.
“He told me after Raiden left the Lee and Melanie had screwed things up. I didn’t think he actually believed that to the fullest extent, but he claimed he did.” She stopped talking. How was she supposed to tell this man that she loved what happened next? How was she to explain it when just a week prior that man she desired to be with once had kidnapped the ex-fiancée of the man she wanted now? The fiancée of her best friend.
“Bethany, I’m not letting you off the hook. I need to know whatever it is that’s bothering you.” His arms wrapped around her and her back was pressed against his chest.
“Okay, so it goes like this…” She trailed off and remembered that night for Jordan and the events that followed.
“You don’t believe that, Lukas?” she replied taking a sip of her seventh beer for the night. She knew she should stop. In fact, Raiden had tried to cut her off, but she fought him on it throwing the fact they weren’t married yet in his face so he didn’t own her. Raiden sighed and left.
“I do. You don’t regret your life, knowing what you could have?” he fired back.
“No Kai, I like my life.” She answered on a sigh.
“Ha! Yeah right. You’re stuck marrying Raiden. You are happy with that fact?” She shrugged.
“It is what it is.” she said taking a long swig of the beer.
Kai pulled the bottle from her lips, his face close to hers. Her heart stopped. The truth was Kai was right, she didn’t want Raiden, and she wanted Kai. “What do you want, Bethany?” he muttered against her lips.
“You,” she breathed. She was tipsy and not in her right mind. She wanted Kai but this was wrong. His lips closed over hers and she couldn’t stop what happened next.
Kai carried her to her room and there they had sex. Kai Lukas took her virginity. “Doll, I’m going Dark Night in three weeks join me,” he whispered before vanishing.’
“Three weeks after, we were all standing in front of the elder panel. I was the youngest so I was last. Raiden was first then Kai. He crushed me when the word ‘Stay’ fell from his lips. I tried to talk to him, but got nowhere.”
“Kai!” She called once they were dismissed. He turned towards her and just shook his head before walking away.
“I can’t believe he didn’t choose dark night.” Raiden spoke coming up behind her as Kai walked away. Bethany shrugged at his words.
“I need to go,” she said hastily. She didn’t feel right and she feared…well, she feared what would now be the worst.
Raiden grabbed her hand and spun her around. They hadn’t talked since that night. Bethany hadn’t been able to face him after she slept with Kai. “Are you okay, Bethany?”
She just nodded. “I’m sorry about three weeks ago, Beth.”
“I know,” she said twisting away from him. She couldn’t do this, not now at least.
He turned her around and studied her. She hadn’t come out right and said it yet. She knew he was thinking about it though.
“You got pregnant, didn’t you?” he asked, his voice was gentle not harsh like she expected. She just nodded. “What happened to the baby, Bethany?” he asked pulling her back a little to really look at her. She bit her lip not sure if she could speak. “Beautiful?” he pressed.
“I didn’t have a choice. After that day, I knew the Kai Lukas I cared about was gone. I went to my mom and we didn’t tell a soul. Not my dad, not Raiden, not Lee, not Melanie. No One!” she stammered. He grabbed her into a tight hug right as the tears fell. She hated doing that, but it was the only choice.
“Shhh…I understand, beautiful.” She just sobbed into his arms. He picked her up and carried her to her room. Once she was on the bed, he brushed the tears from her cheek. She just studied him. What was he thinking?
“Jordan?” she questioned.
“It’ll be okay, beautiful. Rest.” He kissed her cheek and suddenly she did feel tired. She closed her eyes and fell fast asleep.
Jordan
Once she was asleep he made a phone call. He could accept what she told him. It happened years ago, but he could tell the heartbreak was still there. Not because she had feelings for Kai anymore, that way at least, but because she didn’t want to go through it again. He could understand that fear.
“Jordan?” she questioned.
“Hi Grace, can you meet somewhere to talk?” he asked rubbing the back of his neck.
“Everything okay?” she asked. He loved Grace. She was concerned for her daughter always. She was nothing like Meredith.
“Fine. I think anyways. I just wanted to talk about some decisions I’m thinking about making.” Bethany needed space and that meant he did as well. He loved her but he had to back-up a bit.
“You’re not leaving?” she asked.
“No Ma’am,” he responded firmly.
“Okay, well I’m at the house come over we’ll have coffee and talk.” He nodded knowing full well she couldn’t see him before hanging up.
He walked back into her bedroom. She was an angel. His angel, but he had to heed Raiden’s words she needed room to maneuver. “Be back, beautiful,” he whispered in her ear before kissing her cheek.
“Where are you going?” she mumbled sleepily.
“Just to talk with someone. Don’t worry, I’ll be back.” She looked unsure, but nodded and settled back down.
He didn’t want her to worry. And she would’ve if he said he was going to talk with her mom. She probably would worry for a couple reasons in fact, but Jordan was on a mission. Make sure Grace knew his intentions with Bethany were the purest possible.
He had just arrived at Grace’s house, and she met him at the door. “Jordan, welcome,” she said sweetly as he was climbing out of the ca
r.
“Hi Ma’am, thank you for agreeing to this,” he said walking towards the door.
“Warning you right now, I am not Meredith Coretti.” Jordan nodded.
“I made a mistake, something I would never consider trying to repeat,” he responded.
Bethany had told her mom what had happened between him and Tai. Grace and Jordan hadn’t ever talked about it though till right then.
“Come in.” She smiled warning out of the way and forgotten. He knew Grace didn’t like what had happened. Hell, Jordan was still kicking himself for what he did to Tai. Meredith shouldn’t have done what she did, but Jordan should have pushed her away and he didn’t.
“So what’s going on, Jordan? Is my baby okay?” Jordan prepared his coffee and then sat across from her at the dining room table.
“I don’t know. She was pushing me away this week and I knew it wasn’t about her commitment to Raiden anymore. She told me today about Kai.” Grace sat back in the chair and sighed.
“I hated having to do that, but when she came to me we knew we didn’t have a choice. If Kai saw her pregnant he would’ve known it was his.” Jordan nodded.
“Do you think it might’ve changed things for him?” Jordan asked sipping his coffee.
“If I thought that baby, along with my baby could reach Kai Lukas I wouldn’t have done what I did. I knew at that point Kai was lost to us.” Jordan understood that completely.
“I love your daughter, Grace. I never knew I hadn’t really loved till I met her.” Jordan paused.
“But…?” she prompted.
“But she needs space and being so close all the time is making it hard on me to be patient. I want to be patient.” She nodded.
“What do you need?” she asked.
“Another job. I don’t mind staying at the apartment but we have a ton of shifts together coming up. I think if we weren’t working together it would help us both.” Jordan hated that, but it was the truth. They needed a little time apart.